If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
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