discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
