I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Randomize
