He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Rumble strips road head = magical
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
