He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
