i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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