I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
