I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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