what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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