doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
