Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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