We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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