Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
