I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
