Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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