Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
