id be glad to
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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