Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
