I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
