Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
