How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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