I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
