In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
