we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
