that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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