We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
