i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
i've created a new STD.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
