Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
