Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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