I heard we made out
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
