woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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