Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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