I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
