hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
