I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
