Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
