I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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