he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
