I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
