ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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