So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I am naked and annoyed.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
