all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
