WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
