For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Randomize