im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
