At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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