just tell him i said nine months
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
