Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
