Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
