How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize